The English Mansion’s
Glossary of Femdom & Kink Terms

The world of kink has many of its own specific terms, many that are now recognized by the mainstream. Lesser known is the realm of Femdom, which has its own hidden erotic language or jargon, this is not so widely understood. So here in this glossary are some familiar kink classics plus some unique femdom argot. Oh and Kinksters do love an acronym!
I’ve found some of terms here difficult to pin down in a short, two line definition. So any thoughts or constructive amendments are welcome in the comments.

100 Femdom & Kink Terms Pt2
Orgasm Control ~ Scene Dynamics ~ Play Activities ~ Kinks & Fetishes

♣ Orgasm Control ♣

Edging: Where a sub is brought to the edge of orgasm, by means of a HJ (handjob) or from instruction during a JOI. Then denied release, usually done over and over again. This can be a Domme exercising her total control over a sub (where the stopping is done for cruelty) or a means to have a more intense climax (where the stopping is to build up for the eventual release). The sub may eventually be given ‘Permission To Cum‘ or it can end in a frustrating denial.

JOI/Jerk Off Instruction: Where a sub is instructed and guided through masturbating or jerking their own cock, e.g. fast/slow; stop/start.

Permission To Cum: Subs must always ask permission to cum from a Domina, they may or may not be permitted.

Ruined Orgasm: During a handjob a Domme will let go of the penis either just one second before the climax, or immediately after the 1st spurt. This will both ruin the orgasm and prevent the sub from continuing to enjoy being aroused by dissipating all the sexual build up.

Cum Countdown: Where the Domina counts down from a set number, e.g. Ten; the sub must cum exactly when they reach Zero. Often used at the end of a JOI.

CEI/Cum Eating Instruction: A sub must eat their own cum or the cum of another male sub, as instructed by a Domina.

Chastity: Where a sub is prevented from touching, masturbating or orgasming, save at the whim or choice of their partner. Usually achieved by means of a metal/plastic cage-like device that is locked on. The state of chastity can be a temporary state for a few hours or days; or can be lifestyle where chastity is maintained over extended periods. The person with the key becomes the Key Holder. It can act to focus the wearer on giving sexual pleasure/service rather than receiving it; or be used as part of the general control of a sub.

Erotic Sexual Denial: Where a sub/partner is kept sexually aroused, while delaying or preventing resolution through physical orgasm; thus keeping them in a continued state of heightened sexual anticipatory tension. This could be during an edging session, requiring sub’s to ask permission to cum or while a submissive is locked in a chastity device for days or weeks.

♣ Scene Dynamics ♣

Cuckolding: When consensually a man’s wife has sex with other partners, sometimes in front of him. In femdom we also have slave cuckolding where the slave’s Domina may engage in sex with another partner/slave/other woman as a means of humiliation.

Compersion: Pleased or aroused (instead of jealous) when one’s partner has sex or is receiving sexual pleasure from another person.

Uxy: A submissive husband, as opposed to slave or sub. (From the adjective “uxorious”.)

Vituperess: An expert practitioner in extreme verbal humiliation. (From the adjective “vituperative”.)

SPH/Small Penis Humiliation: Extreme verbal humiliation of the male genitalia. (Has no bearing on the actual size.)

CFNM/Clothed Female Naked Male: A fetish or specific scenario in which one or more females remain fully clothed while one or more males are completely nude. Creating a humiliating power dynamic.

Edge Play: A scene that takes you to the very edge of your psychological limits, often using fear as a tool.

OTK: Over the knee spanking.

Corner Time:  Making the sub face the wall or stand in the corner either to contemplate their behaviour or as a humiliating punishment, often with their punished bottom on display.

Scenario: A pre-determined story or situation. There are many ‘classic’ kink scenarios, e.g. sissy maid training or lady boss with new boy employee etc.

Role-Play:  The improvised acting out of a pre-determined scenario.

Virgin: A (sort of) prefix/suffix to an activity the sub has never tried before. For example, Pegging Virgin: An individual who has never been pegged with a strapon; or Virgin Bottom: An individual who has never been beaten before. The actual physical backside of a Virgin Bottom is called a Peach Bottom as it will mark rather badly the 1st time.

♣ Play Activities ♣

CP: Corporal Punishment, aka Impact Play extreme sensation play i.e. spanking, caning, whipping etc.

Warm Up:  The important process of slowly and gently beating an area in order to redden it/bring blood to the surface before a heavier punishment takes place. This helps prevent marking but also allows the endorphins to begin to circulate, making the subsequent beating more of a sexual/heightened sensation rather than cold harsh pain.

Six of the Best: Six hard strokes of the cane, usually given as a punishment.

Bastinado: A type of impact play, using an stick like implement in a rapid continuous drumming of the skin often used for beating the cock or feet.

Florentine: A elaborate flogging technique involving the use of two floggers (or specialist ball or finger-floggers), one in each hand, used simultaneously. The floggers are then swung one after the other in an interlocking figure of 8 pattern. It’s both elegant to watch and highly rhythmical to feel.

NT/Nipple Torment: Play causing extreme sensations to the nipples, e.g. clamps, suction etc.

CBT/Cock & Ball Torment: Play causing extreme sensations to the male genitalia, e.g. electric cock rings, ball weights etc.

WS/Watersports/Golden Showers: Peeing on, in front, near your partner/sub. It may or may not include making them drink it.

Pegging: The use of a strapon cock to perform anal intercourse on a partner.

(Peg) A2M: ‘Ass to Mouth’ anally pegging a sub then face fucking them immediately afterwards.

Analgasm/Sissygasm: An ejaculation from anal stimulation.

Queening: The act of a woman sitting on a man’s face while he licks her cunt/arsehole/bottom to pleasure her.

Facesitting: Distinct from Queening, face sitting is usually done clothed and is wrapped up with many fetishes like bottom or panties worship; restricted breathing/smothering; human furniture; or crushing/wrestling.

Sounding: Using medical grade metal rods (Sounds) to stretch the male urethra.

Breath Play: Any play activity where the Domme controls the sub’s breathing. Rebreathing, restrictive breathing and the use of masks/bubblers are are forms of breath play. For example, Restricted breathing can occur during Facesitting. NOTE: All Breath Play activites should only ever done for extremely short periods, under 1 min!

Shibari & Kinbaku: A Japanese style of elaborate rope bondage including suspensions.

Bondage: Acts involving the physical restraint of a partner. Bondage can refer to total bodily restraint, but it can be limited to a particular body part, such as CBT bondage.

Mummification: Immobilising the body by wrapping it up, usually with multiple layers of tight thin plastic sheeting, for e.g. clingfilm. The face/mouth/nose mst be left uncovered. Purpose made leather/latex/nylon body bags may also be used– these may include straps/buckles to enable the slave to be restrained/suspended or vacuum bags where the air is evacuated to form skintight restraint.

SenDep: Sensory Deprivation forms part of intense bondage scenes where a person is gagged, blindfolded and has their ears muffled or filled with white noise. (There are also specialist hoods, body bags or bondage boxes that remove all sensory information.) This acts to either intensify the bondage or make them hyper aware of extreme sensations, as there are no other distractions.

♣ Kinks & Fetishes ♣

Fetish: A specific sexually arousing or erotic fixation on an object or experience.

Turned Bi: A sexual fetish in which a straight man is encouraged to perform sexual acts with another man. This can be as a humiliation or entertainment. (It has no bearing on their sexuality.)

XDressing: Umbrella term for feminisation and gender transformations, crossdressing, sissification, dollification etc.

Crossdressing: The wearing of female attire, especially underwear but not necessarily for feminisation.

Dollification: The process of transforming into a mindless living doll. Usually using masks and feminising body suits. Also Bimbofication: The process of transforming into a mindless ultra feminine bimbo using exaggerated hyper feminized make-up and clothes. The change is not just external but used to create an heightened ‘mindless’ submissive state and eager to please demeanour.

Pup/Puppy Play & Ponyboy/Pony Play: Where a sub chooses or is made to act like a puppy or pony. This can be part of an extreme dehumanisation or to become a cherished but powerless pet. With special training/obedience required. The sub’s mindset may be that of a man being treated/humiliated as a lowly animal or they ‘become’ the dumb animal.

Ball Busting: The kicking, punching, squeezing and crushing of the male testicles by a woman.

Foot Worship:  Acts of kissing, sniffing, massaging, licking & sucking feet. Can be an act of submission or connected with foot fetishism. Likewise for: Shoe Worship, Stocking Worship, Leg Worship, Boot Worship, Glove Worship.

Trampling: The act of crushing a person with your bare feet, shoes, boots and high heels. Can be an act of submission connected with a crushing fetish or, e.g. with high heels used, for NT and CBT.

Footjob: Similar to Handjobs, but involves using feet rather than hands to rub and stimulate the genitals. Likewise for: Shoejob, Bootjob, Glovejob.

Frottage: Rubbing, usually the penis against a person for arousal. A  non-penetrative way to feel pleasure by rubbing body parts together for sexual stimulation – often may be two subs made to rub their cocks together as a means of humiliation. (From the French “frotter” to rub.)

Vore: A fetish in which people fantasize about devouring a living being alive, or being devoured alive. Often connnected with Giantess fetish. (From the Latin “to swallow, devour”.)

Giantess: A fetish for being squished, swallowed, handled or exploring the body of a gigantic woman, often hundreds of times your size.

Findom/Financial domination: A D/s fetish where a sub (known as a $lave, finsub, paypig, human ATM or cash piggy) will give gifts/money or be ‘rinsed’ by a Findom, a financial Domina. He accepts his meagre lot, suffering and working for her, while she enjoys a lavish lifestyle. It’s also a way of paying homage, usually from afar, to elicit attention, usually humiliating, from an (often young), beautiful woman.

100 Femdom & Kink Terms Part 1:
The Basics  ~  Scene Cognizance  ~  Femdom

The English Mansion’s
Glossary of Femdom & Kink Terms

The world of kink has many of its own specific terms, many that are now recognized by the mainstream. Lesser known is the realm of Femdom, which has its own hidden erotic language or jargon, this is not so widely understood. So here in this glossary are some familiar kink classics plus some unique femdom argot. Oh and Kinksters do love an acronym!
I’ve found some of terms here difficult to pin down in a short, two line definition. So any thoughts or constructive amendments are welcome in the comments.

100 Femdom & Kink Terms Pt1
The Basics  ~  Scene Cognizance  ~  Femdom

♣  The Basics ♣

BDSM: The infamous initialism, (though what the letters stand for is not agreed upon) so roughly, Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism. Together identifying the gamut of kinky practices or role playing power exchange used in alternative sexual relationships.

Dom/sub or D/s: Given roles in a consensually agreed power exchange. A Dominant has all the authority and takes control either on a permanent or temporary basis. A submissive relinquishes all their agency and power in the relationship.

Switch: A person who can assume either the Dom or sub role, depending on their preferences, mood or dynamics of the encounter.

Mistress/slave: A more defined, all encompassing D/s consensual relationship which often denotes a type of  24/7 or TPE relationship. A submissive may retain some rights, whereas a slave becomes, in effect, property. (Slave status does not outweigh the dominant’s obligations to play that is SSC.)

Top/Bottom: Given roles in a scene with no emphasis on power exchange. The Top is the giver, administer of the sensations and architect of the scene. The Bottom is the ‘receiver’ of various sensations in a scene. For example, the Bottom may be a masochist but not a submissive. While a submissive will always be a Bottom.

Topping from the Bottom: 1.) Where a Bottom purports to be a submissive but who nonetheless wants to direct the action. 2.) Where a sub/Bottom acts in a demanding manner, or attempts to manipulate the Dom/Top to have their own needs met, e.g. intentionally misbehaving in order to be punished.

Brat: A sub who is deliberately uncooperative or disobedient in order to elicit attention or punishment.

Sadist: Person who enjoys inflicting pain, usually sexually motivated.

Painslut: aka Masochist, A person who enjoys receiving a heavy degree of pain for sensual/sexual pleasure, may or may not necessarily be a submissive.

Kinkster: A person who enjoys and participates in unconventional sexual practices and preferences, outside of Vanilla (societal) norms. Those who engage in BDSM, fetishism, or other forms of alternative sexual expressions. May be a Dom/sub/switch or just a fetishist with no interest in submission, sadism or masochism.

Vanilla: a) A person who is not involved in the BDSM/fetish/kink lifestyle. b) An adjective for anything not involving kinky activities, for e.g. a vanilla job; vanilla (straight) sex.

Newbie: Someone new to BDSM, not derogatory.

Scene: a) A pre-planned time and space where BDSM activities take place. A scene may occur at a club or some other play space and may or may not include sexual activity. b) ‘The Scene’ is also used by BDSM community to refer to itself.

Dungeon/Chamber: A play space kitted out with elaborate BDSM equipment and toys.

Play Party: A BDSM event with people engaging in couple or group scenes. Play parties can enable Dominas to share subs/slaves or give unattached subs the opportunity to meet/submit to Dominas.

DM: Dungeon Monitor, a person who volunteers to oversee the interactions between participants at a Play Party to ensure their safety.

Munch: A group of people that practice BDSM, meeting up to chat at a Vanilla venue in street-appropriate attire.

Bunny: Someone who bottoms for a demo at a fetish event, for e.g. a rope bunny, wax bunny or bondage bunny.

♣ Scene Cognizance ♣

Negotiation: A conversation usually in advance of the scene where the parties agree limits, preferences, safewords; and discuss fantasies, experiences, medical issues etc.

Safeword: A word serving as a prearranged and unambiguous signal to end a BDSM scene or scene activity. Always respected. “Red” is often considered as a universal safe word. Some players like a comical word in order to break-out from an intense role play, e.g. “Pineapple”. Or a series of Safewords, i.e. “Green” everything is OK; “Amber” getting close to their limit; “Red” stop immediately.

Hard Limit: An activity or context for an activity that is considered completely off-limits. Established in the pre-scene play Negotiation.

Soft Limit: An activity or context for an activity that one party is hesitant about or nervous to try but will enter into. Established in the pre-scene play Negotiation.

Subspace: The natural endorphin high a sub/bottom may experience during an intense physical, psychological and/or emotional scene.

Subdrop: An emotional and physical low, experienced by a sub/bottom after an intense scene. It begins anywhere from a few hours to a few days after the endorphin high and can last for hours or days.

Aftercare: Set period after a scene where the Top/Dominant makes sure their play partner is OK and takes extra care with their well being. This may involve cuddles, reassurance, sugary drinks/snacks, a rest period. Can be an important step in mitigating the potential for Subdrop.

CNC/Consensual Non-Consent: A mutual agreement that within defined limits, and subject to a Safeword, consent to activities is given without foreknowledge of them. For ex. a capture fantasy scene or Turned Bi play.

SSC/Safe, Sane and Consensual: A guideline used by some in the BDSM community which emphasises ensuring that activities are safe and sane. That all participants have capacity to give consent and that that explicit consent is obtained from all parties involved. Slightly different from RACK/Risk Aware Consensual Kink: which emphasizes informed risk-taking over predetermined notions of safety.

♣ Femdom ♣

Femdom: The abbreviation of Female Domination. A relationship/dynamic/ scene play whereby the female is in a position of power and superiority over the male.

Dominatrix: A woman who physically and/or psychologically dominates her partner within a BDSM scene or relationship. Ordinarily uses one of the honorifics: Mistress, Lady, Domina, Madame, Princess or Goddess.

Prodom/ProDomme: A Professional Dominatrix (female).

Session: An agreed time period of play with a Prodom.

Domme/Dom/Domina: Woman who exercises control over men (& some submissive women.)

High-Protocol: When there is a strict and formal enactment of roles for both the sub and Domme alongside understood conventions, strict rules and etiquette.

Linguistic High-Protocol: A written form of high-protocol used as a way of denoting your Domme or sub status, usually found online. All references to a Mistress are capitalised, while slaves use all lower-case pronouns, e.g.
“i am Your slave, Ma’am”.

Service: Acts, chores, errands or labour, sexual or otherwise performed by a sub for the benefit of a Domme.

24/7 or TPE/Total Power Exchange: A D/s relationship in which set rules and protocols are in place continuously (negotiated in advance).

Slave Contract: A written agreement between a Mistress and her slave (not legally binding), outlining the slave’s service to their Mistress. Including rules, obligations, protocols, duties, punishments for any breeches, period of servitude etc. These must be strictly adhered to or the relationship may be terminated.

Slave Auction: Where a Domme auctions off Her slave to other Dommes/participants (usually at a Play Party, for temporary use and not for monetary gain). Slave auctions reinforce a slave’s position as property and absence of power.

FLR/ Female Led Relationship: An intimate relationship where the female partner has control over the male i.e. a femdom relationship, usually within a domestic setting, typically a marriage or committed girlfriend/boyfriend. Ranging from only affecting certain facets e.g. in the bedroom or decision making; to total command over all aspects of the partnership.

Collared sub/ Collaring: The formal acceptance by a dominant of a slave’s service to them or their ‘ownership’ by a Mistress. A domme may have multiple collared slaves. The collaring may last for a few hours or a number of years. Can be accompanied by a ceremony, usually comes before the signing of a slave contract.

Collar: The physical proclamation of Collaring. A slave should wear their collar with pride at all times in the presence of their Domme. Collars may range from leather chokers to elaborate iron bands fastened by buckles or locked in place by his proprietrix. Where it is inappropriate for a Collared sub to wear his collar in a vanilla place, a Domme may require the slave to wear an alternative discrete symbol to remind the slave or his ownership. For example, a gold chain.

MILF: Slang for ‘Mature (or Mother) I’d Like to Fuck’, denoting an attractive older woman. Similar to Cougar but Cougar also implies a sexually aggressive older/mature woman.

100 Femdom & Kink Terms Pt2:
Orgasm Control ~ Scene Dynamics ~ Play Activities ~ Kinks & Fetishes